I can do it.

This is what I have been telling myself on my attempt to exchange conventional cigarettes wit an electronic one. I like the electronic one. It's cleaner and more revonlutionary with the case I have for it and the cartridges you use for nicotine top ups. I have found that it's not the nicotine that I miss. I am getting it. It's those little rituals I go through to get my fags. For instance the first thing I do when I wake up no matter what time it is is find a store that sells cigarette and walk to it. I enjoy exhausting a bit of energy. That little walk has become habit. It starts the day off for me. With the e-cig I needn't go for the walk so am sat wondering what to do. Don't worry I have a plan. It starts Monday.

My swimming costume finally arrived. It's a little too big. Can you believe it? But my bits will stay covered. I ordered another one just in case this one got lost in the post. I will have two...the other being slightly smaller so should if I lose weight last longer. I also order some paddles to swim with and some fins. I have already got the pull buoy and kick board. The paddles are worn on the hands and create greater resistance in the water which increases arm strength and makes the heart work harder. The fins are good for improving Butterfly kick and am not sure what else. I will let you know when I try them out. I also got goggles the other day and a Lycra swimming cap. I got the Lycra cap instead of the normal silicone one because my parents bought me one years ago and although I was embarrassed of it at the time because no one else had one. I like the fact of having one now. It gives me a warm feeling and reminds me of then. The goggles are a bit tight and need adjusting. I am hoping they are adults ones and have some give. I will have a closer look later. I have a water resistance watch that has a stop watch which I will need to time myself swimming and resting. I have a good Speedo bag that fits my kick board and pull boy in and will also have room for a towel. I do not know if I will be able to fit the paddles and fins in too but wonder if I will need all that equipment for one training session. I will cross that bridge if I come to it. I will always be able to compromise. Last week I also got a little waterproof bag with waterproof ear phones to put my MP3 player in so that I can listen to music while swimming. I have later discovered that Speedo actually do a waterproof MP3 player. I have gone over board I know and have splashed out on it. I have read it is very good and makes swimming more enjoyable and productive. I can't wait to experience the effect of listen to music under water. I will give the little waterproof bag with waterproof ear phones to Shirley my sister in law.

I feel a bit embarrassed having all the equipment already when I am only a novice again. I did contact swimming clubs and one has said for me to get fit and then contact them. They are jammed packed to to get in is quite hard. The other club wants to time me but I think it's a bit early days for that and so will need to work on my own. I am going to keep an eye on qualifying times for galas and work up to that and then perhaps join. I want to join a club for company, team spirit, training and to reform in galas again. Am I still young enough?

I start Monday morning on my first session. I am going to be going at 7.30 am, the time allocated for fitness. I am hoping that it won't be too full and imagine people won't block my way as I swim the lengths. My first training session will be 9 x 50m lengths of freestyle. The first two lengths concentrating on long strokes. 3-4 concentrating on proper breathing. 5-6 concentrating on small kicks. 7-9 concentrating on small even pace. This will build endurance and proper technique in freestyle. I will do this each day for a week (5 days) and start another work out the following week. I also plan not to get any cigareets and to just smoke my e-cig from this day.

On Monday I also have an interview with the PDSA for the volunteer job I was talking about in a previous post, working in a charity shop. I am in two minds about it. Why don't I get a paid job. With the spending I have done I am in debt and need to pay it off. The truth is I need to build endurance in every day life before I embark on trying to get paid. One step at a time, hey.